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Have You Seen This Monkey?
From Ohio police today:
The bulletin issued by police in the southwest Ohio town of Springdale describes the subject as two feet tall, weighing eight pounds, clad only in blue pants and prone to sleeping in trees.
It's another week full of monkeys, and we have the latest.
For some time, we've all known that researchers have proven that male monkeys will pay to see pictures of female monkey butts, a finding they say could make an impact in the study of autism. (Autism? Somehow I just can't see Rainman on some internet monkey site) Now Duke scientists have discovered that monkeys like to gamble too, and prefer taking a chance to a sure thing. I've already wrote a couple of weeks ago about monkeys who attack people, and do other really strange things.
On top of all that, a new drug seems to help monkeys stay awake, days on end it seems. The drug is supposed to have usefulness for people like firefighters and fighter pilots. One supposes the monkeys are staying up late at night paying to see monkey butts, or shooting craps with the gorillas in the zoo down the street.
There is only one conclusion I can make after reading all this news: monkeys are having a better time than I am. You never read a study about monkeys writing blog entries, writing computer programs, or picking up the groceries. Nope. Monkeys have better things to do -- they are a bunch of wild and crazy primates.
So what about Dillon, the circus monkey, who fled into a nearby woods early on Monday after being frightened by a train whistle from tracks near where the circus was performing in Springdale? If I were the cops, I'd be checking out the local Casino, look for wide-awake short little hairy guy with a couple of bonobos at his side. Just don't make him mad.
Thanks for the laugh:) I enjoyed the article and I think you are right on the money about where to look for the missing money.