Weight loss surgery: the good, the bad, and the ugly
Posting the title today, it makes me feel like I’m part of some late-night infomercial. I lost over 100 pounds in five months! And you can too! Just buy my book, “Eat like a pig and gain all the weight you want, them have them chop your stomach out”
Act now! Supplies are limited! lol
People say that weight loss surgery (WLS) is “taking the easy way out” or “cheating”
Not so sure about that.
First, if you are overweight and killing yourself, what does the word “cheating” even mean? That you’re supposed to die rather than do something to save yourself? Saving yourself doesn’t sound like cheating to me. And what part of undertaking major surgery is “taking the easy way out”? I spent three months at home being sore and eating mushy food. I’m going to be on dietary supplements my entire life. The nutritionist says there are things I will never be able to eat again. I basically have a self-inflicted wound that’s something like most folks used to get in a war. Which was the easy part?
Yet for many it all boils down to 1) how much weight you lost, and 2) how fast you lost it. The first month I lost 45 pounds. That’s freaking incredible. Looking back on it, I’m still not sure I can make sense of what happened. I used to wear a size XXX Large. Now I wear just a Large. I used to worry about breaking chairs when I sat on them. Now I sit on the edge of a table and don’t think too much about it. I used to have sore muscles simply from standing and walking around for an hour. Now I can stand for several hours at a time without problem. Maybe run a mile or two when I’m done.
I’m the incredible disappearing Daniel.
I guess from the outside it does seem like cheating, or like magic, to have such a drastic change in such a short period of time.
It’s weird. Body language is all different now. I went to talk to my youngest son the other day and, joking around, stood arms akimbo and made some silly statement as part of a joke. Then I realized: hey, I can actually pull of the arms akimbo thing seriously without necessarily looking silly. I can maneuver around things much easier than I used to — don’t bump into stuff so much. I also can fit in easily and stand as part of a large group, instead of having to stand back a ways to keep from bumping into people.
At my 1-month checkup, there was a lady in the waiting room getting her 12-month checkup. Several of us started talking about how much weight we had lost. I said I was down 40 pounds. She kind of smiled and said “You know, it slows down. Those first few months you’re losing like gangbusters. But it doesn’t work that way later on”
Now I’m beginning to see what she meant. Over the last 6 weeks or so, I’ve gotten into the pattern of losing one week, then holding steady the next week. So one week I’m all happy and kicking butt and taking names. The next week I’m down in the dumps ready to give the whole thing up. Even though I feel like I’m doing the same thing.
What I’m finding out that I can’t change is this: we focus too much on weight, both as surgery patients and as a country. I was more happy about my weight when I was fat than I am weighing everyday and fretting over whether I’m losing or not. Even though in general I’m extremely more pleased with life in general without all the extra baggage to carry around! Life is about more than a number.
Need to make peace with this issue without either ignoring it or obsessing over it. I think getting out of the house and working with clients is helping a lot. After the holidays I I’m going to move my billable hours back up to 40+ hours per week. Get on the road and away from the scales during the week.
I realize that I’m very lucky that I work for myself and am able to flex my schedule. It also helps that I have disposable income to handle a lot of the money stuff. I didn’t expect that. Even with insurance, weight loss surgery has been expensive. There’s been vitamins, special foods, medicine, gym memberships, and sports drinks. I think you can get by cheaper, but it’s been nice to be able to try to deal with just the WLS stuff, instead of trying to deal with that and pinching pennies too.
Clothes have been an especially painful chore. You’d think it’d be fun to lose weight and have new clothes to wear, right? And it is. But also can be quite a hassle. I’ve kept all of my clothes over the years, so I have big plastic boxes of stuff in a storage building of all sizes. The trick is getting them all out and going through them.
So you dig out six or seven huge boxes and start sorting clothes. A good start is sorting by waist size, but as I’m learning, clothes manufacturers lie about clothes sizes to make people feel more skinny than they actually are. As a guy, this makes no sense at all to me, but that’s the way it works.
Fashions change over time, and what you need to wear changes, so even going through all the old clothes doesn’t necessarily make you have a new wardrobe. I went from size 52 pants to size 48. Then 46s. Then 44s. At the 44-inch waist size, I started running out of good dress pants and jeans. So I ordered new 42s when I reached that size. Some of the 42s were big, some were snug. They were all from the same manufacturer and were the same exact clothes, just different colors. Yet each fit completely different.
Now I’m down to 40s and it’s time to buy more jeans. I think I’m completely out of dress clothes. Hopefully with my weight loss slowing down this latest purchase will last a couple of months or more. But then again, I don’t want them to last too long! I still have a ways to go. Will I make it to 38s? 36s? Who knows? Wouldn’t it be good just to get it over and stabilize?
It was really cool finding stuff I hadn’t worn in 10 or 15 years! Some of those shirts I really missed, perhaps much more than my family did. I had forgotten that I got too big to wear them. And it kinda sucked only having a few weeks to wear some of that stuff. Some of those clothes I went through, sorted, tried out, found, remembered how much I loved them — then never actually had a chance to wear them. Now they’re already too big. Yikes!
Getting into this, I realized that I would be in for a long and bumpy ride over the next year, but it’s been weirder and bumpier in some ways than I have imagined. I’m really glad I did it, but I’ve also found that I’m a fundamentally different person than I used to be. I have a different attitude, I react to stress differently, I do things differently. I miss parts of the old me, and, like a swimmer testing the water with his toes before getting in, I’m cautiously experimenting with bringing back some of the parts I used to like a lot.
Many of the old bad habits are still there too, of course, lurking in the background. I’ve had stomach surgery, not a mind replacement. It remains to be seen whether any of this will last for a long time. I have to keep reminding myself, and others, that it’s normal to lose a lot, then regain some, then lose it back. Many gain it all back. A sizable chunk keep most of it off. Both in weight and lifestyle, I wonder how much of the “old me” will come back — or how much I want it to. But it has been a most enjoyable ride so far, and I’m extremely pleased I took it. Even with all the complaining. Because hey, if you’re not complaining, what fun is doing stuff?
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